No Matter What
by Harbuddha
Summary: Cordelia returns from her apparent "vacation", yet already knows what has happened. Will she strengthen Angel and motivate him to find his son? C/A


DISCLAIMER: Oh, I wish I owned the characters of Angel, but alas, I do not.  
  
SPOILERS: Up though Sleep Tight  
  
WHY I WROTE THIS: I am just going to be really annoyed if Cordelia was seriously on vacation with Groo the entire time this was going on! So, here is what I kind of hope for what will happen. It is probably really off, but stay with me! This is only my second fan-fic. I'll write more chapters if you really want me to! ( Enjoy!!!  
  
PS: This is C/A (  
  
~*NO MATTER WHAT*~  
  
  
  
The sun had just set against the Los Angeles skyline. Night was setting in quickly, and the Hyperion hotel stood out against the swirling purple lights of the horizon. All was quiet, not a sound entered that hotel. It had been an entire day without the sounds of a baby crying or a worried father hovering over a crib. The Angel Investigations team was lacking yet another member, for Wesley lay in LA Memorial Hospital. Fred and Gunn looked at each other anxiously as they cleared away the hotel lobby of debris. Lorne had some of his previous customers throw in a favor and they cleaned up Holtz's lackeys. As for Angel, he hid unbeknownst to the world in his charred room, possibly waiting for his son's miraculous return. But he knew that that day would never come. Though he knew he was the only one who could get his son back from the depths of that hell dimension, he did not feel compelled to do anything about it. He sat inconsolable, and in utter angst, not able to move. Not able to speak.  
  
Cordelia approached the hotel with caution. She hesitated in her slow step as she made her way through the withering garden. She felt that something was terribly wrong. She not only felt it, but she knew it. She had seen it.  
  
The door opened silently, and Cordy pushed her way through, using every ounce of energy she could muster. A slight creak on the hardwood floor alerted Gunn and Fred to her presence.  
  
"Cordelia." Fred said, somewhat alarmed.  
  
"You look-" Gunn couldn't finish that sentence. A glance from Fred silenced him, but he also said nothing because of the look on Cordelia's face. She looked lost, alone, and afraid. She was in pain. She was hurt.  
  
"Where's Angel?" A small voice replied.  
  
"Cordy, we need to fill you in." Gunn didn't want Cordelia walking into a situation she knew nothing about, but somehow, he knew that she already had an idea about what happened.  
  
"I know what happened. Where's Angel?" The faint voice gained no strength in the second attempt to explain.  
  
"He's-he's upstairs. But, I don't know if you want to-" Fred dared not utter another word as Cordelia wistfully flew up the stairs. Where she found the might to move as fast as she did, she would never know. All she knew was that she needed to console her friend. She didn't need any consolation from him, even though she had been through hell. All that mattered was Angel.  
  
As she approached the door, she could already sense his presence. Maybe it came with her new demonic powers, or perhaps she just knew him too well. She felt the door, and stayed there for a moment; unable to make a move -until she was urged by the images that flashed through her head. Her memory had caught up with her and she had to see Angel. She entered the room to find it just as she had seen it before. She had seen it in a vision- one of many.  
  
"Angel-" She spotted him crouched against a wall, in a position she had seen him in before in his previous angst-days. He looked up at her, something she did not even expect. His eyes were lost; they were full of sorrow. He had been crying, that she could tell.  
  
"Cordy?" He asked hopefully. His voice cracked on the second syllable. She hurried towards him and then fell to her knees. She embraced him with her slender arms and held him close to her. His body heaved up and down as he sobbed into her loving arms. That is when all the tears Cordelia had been holding finally shed to the ground beneath her. They held each other for a length of time. No words needed to feel the pain they both felt inside.  
  
"Why-why are you here?" Angel gathered the words as he tried fruitlessly to peer into her soulful eyes.  
  
"I saw everything. The fire, the prophecy, Wesley, Conner…" Cordelia struggled with the last word. Connor. Angel's son. Angel's pride. Her pride.  
  
"You saw? Why-why didn't you come? Why didn't you tell me?" Angel rose with anger. She released his aching body and he stood, hovering over her.  
  
"Why didn't you warn me?"  
  
"Angel, I couldn't-"  
  
"Don't tell me. You were with Groo - comshucking up a storm, you just couldn't bother to let me know?" He spat the last words, hurting Cordelia deeply.  
  
"Groo's dead!" Cordy shouted these words and she, too, rose to meet Angel's eyes.  
  
"We-we were going back to my apartment, after you gave me the money. When we got there, there were so many of them! Vampires, demons, it was unbelievable." Cordelia lost herself in her own words, recalling the dreadful memory.  
  
"They killed him. And-and the next thing I knew I was in some cave, or some underground fortress, and there were vampires all around me. I couldn't move, Angel. I just, I couldn't move. Holtz, it must have been Holtz. He was there. That bastard." Tears streaming down Cordelia's face, it was only then Angel took note of the bruises that marked her face. He looked her up and down and noticed the wounds that scarred her.  
  
"He-he wouldn't let me go! I kept having vision, after vision, and I just couldn't do anything about it!" Sobbing now, Cordy tried to breath. She tried, but failed, as she attempted to recover. This was not her time to cry, she told herself. Angel needs me, now.  
  
"Cordelia, oh God, I'm sorry." A hush  
  
"No! Don't be sorry! I-I shouldn't be doing this." Wiping away the tears she moved towards Angel.  
  
"Please, Angel, I need to help you. We are getting Connor back." With true determination in her voice, Angel let out a sigh.  
  
"We can't. There's no way we can get him back."  
  
"Don't you say that, Angel!" yelling now, she persuaded him to keep the faith,  
  
"Don't you dare say that to me, Angel! We are going to get him back! If it is the last thing I will ever do, I will get your son back."  
  
"Cordy, I don't think we can."  
  
"Of course we can, dammit! You have to have faith that we'll get him back." She smiled towards him, "You would climb the fiery depths of hell to get him back, and here you are saying that you can't? That you can't? Don't say that to me. Don't you ever say that to me."  
  
"Cordy, what the hell did I do without you?"  
  
"I'm sorry." Looking down to find a place on the floor to stare at, Cordelia lowered her head in apparent shame.  
  
"Sorry? Now, if I'm not allowed to say 'I can't', than you cannot tell me that you are sorry. Cordelia, Holtz took you because of me! Because of what I did to him! It is my fault they took you, it is my fault Groo died, and it is my fault," holding up her arm delicately, pondering over her wounds, "that you are hurt. I'm the one who is sorry."  
  
"Angel, it's ok. You didn't do those things. That wasn't you. You have to understand that. Everything will be ok." She stroked his face slightly, and moved into a gentle kiss.  
  
"We will get him back. No matter what else dares to stand in our way." 


End file.
